I decided on you, don’t you get that? I decided on you. I don’t want to go fucking other people and then walk around feeling thrilled and then sad, or empty, or whatever. I like the smell of your hair, and I like the sound of your voice, and I fucking decided on you.
I hate the feeling when you have to say goodbye to someone you want to spend every minute with.
I don’t care that you got into drugs for three months straight, or how much sleep you lost in that period. I don’t care that you went home and fucked that person and woke up at 6am hating everything about yourself, or that you smoked so much you sounded as though your lungs were giving out.
You’re not a bad person for the ways you tried to kill your sadness.
You’re just human, and being human means you need to survive and you do so whichever way you deem fit, fuck everyone else.
I made a poetry account on Instagram, and I could really use your help. Please follow me & like my poetry! Thank you. :*
Dear every person who says that a mental illness is not
a valid reason for not being able to attend school normally,
Say that to the counselor, the school nurse, the paramedics,
and the friend who walked me to the office on the day of my overdose.
Say that to the kids who saw me sleep through first and second period.
Say that to the boy who sleeps in every class.
Tell that to my teacher who had to talk me out
of suicide on a school night.
Tell that to my bio teacher who saw
me break down during a suicide prevention assembly.
Tell that to the housemates who have heard
me call the suicide hotlines.
Tell that to my freshman English teacher who tells
me I look so alive now in comparison to
how dead I looked freshman year.
Say that to any friend who has had to talk me out of suicide.
Say that to any friend who has had to calm me down
after an anxiety attack.
Say that to every friend and follower that has
come to me with thoughts of suicide.
Tell that to the kids who have failing grades because
they can’t focus, the ones who can’t make it through
a school night without having an anxiety attack,
the kids who sleep right when they get home and
straight on until morning, the ones who
have more breakdowns a day than meals a day,
the ones who have spent more time staring
at hospital walls than school hallways.
Tell that to the kids who cry every night.
Tell that to the teenagers in psychiatric wards and treatment centers.
Tell that to the family of someone who has just committed suicide.
Tell them that school is more important than their sanity.
god who fucking cares. who fucking cares. who fucking cares. everyone stop being offended and mad over the smallest shit ever. ask urself who the fuck fucking cares